Meet Virginia

I just found out that my best friend went on a hush..hush..road trip without moi'. I'm not going to be upset over it. It is her anniversary and she is with her hubba bubba. Threes a crowd all all that bullshit excuse. 


My first hint of an indication of her whereabouts came to me on facebook where the bitch bestie posted a picture of snow. SNOW? Come on now we live in sunny funny Florida and it would have to be the end of the world as we know it before it would snow here. As everyone knows the world is not going to end until December 21, 2012.


Next the taunting text messages began to arrive causing a disquieting harmful effect on me.


Mental anguish took over my being upon the rapid arrival of photo messages. Oh the pain of it all.


To put the icing on the cake I received a text message from a second 
fiend friend. 


My second beastie  bestie had moved to Virgin Virginia last year and  
I have missed her everyday since. So Miss Virginia texts me : Guess who's here? They (the traitor and her patsy)  surprised me and they are here to V-a-c-a-t-i-o-n (cue bubblegum vacation song by the Go-Go's) Well isn't that Special !


So Ms. Virginia texts me : "save your pennies and you have a free place to stay. Country house..jacuzzi bath..swimming pool in the summer..don't ever have to leave..just bring food and drinks..So peaceful." salt to the wound, I say: at least give me tequila with that.


So I reply: " Don't you worry about me. The 50 cats and I are doing just FINE.


So here is what I am missing:

Damn you all to H- E- double Hockey Sticks!!!






And your little dog too!