Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Breakfast ?

   I asked  one of my students to sit down because it was time for breakfast. He replied " No thanks, I'm not feeling it today."


   I fought back my reply of  "Yes I agree with you I'm not feeling it either as far as teaching goes today."
  


    Counting down the days till my vacation. July please get here soon.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Casey Anthony/Caylee Anthony Murder Trial

 I live in Orlando and the media circus is in town:
                    Casey, Casey, Casey.....hope your trial doesn't take as long as it's taking Oprah to say good bye.....geez Louise!

So now we find out Caylee "drowned" and George was in on it....lovely family, just saying...
When someone drowns doesn't the family immediately call 9-1-1?
This was a human child not a pet animal that you would bury in the back yard.
The trail is already beginning to sound like National Enquirer headlines.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Oh No! Oprah is going off...sniffle...seriously people a TV show is ending.....



But...but...its the OPRAH! How will I know what books to read? How will I know how to plan for retirement? How will I know how to handle my romantic relationships? Will I ever hear the words... Your getting a NEW CAR? How will I know how to dress for my age? When will I ever get that make over? How will I lose weight? How will I know what my favorite things are? How will I know how and when to wipe my ass?

Friday, May 20, 2011

Tales From Out of School

     This months curriculum in my preschool class is bugs. We have been learning all about butterflies,spiders,caterpillars,bees, etc. On the playground yesterday my class and I accidentally stumbled upon a black beetle. I decided to go with the flow and we captured the bug and placed him into a clear plastic cup with a lid to study. I thought to myself: this is a great teachable moment. I told the children that we could take Mr. Beetle inside and exam him in the cup. I explained that we had to take great care as not to shake the cup or squish the bug. We sat around and passed the bug cup around to each student at circle time. The children laughed and squealed with delight/fright at the honor of holding the bug. We talked about how many legs he had and took out our book of bugs to find out more about him. I told the children that we were just going to borrow the bug for awhile and explained that we needed to release him back to nature unharmed.

     The day went on and it was nap time. I ended up going home before the children awoke from nap. As I was laying down last night to sleep I realized that I had forgotten to have the children place the bug back outside. This morning at work the first thing I did was check to see if the bug was still among the living. He was. So at circle time we all bid a farewell to Mr. Beetle. I told the children that the bug was missing his mom and dad and he needed to go home. I reminded them about how they feel when their moms and dads are at work.

   We all went outside and I opened the cup Mr.Beetle scurried out of the cup to the sound of the children's laughter and screams. He walked two feet away and then stopped and turned back to our classroom door. Suddenly out of nowhere came a ugly lizard. What happened next was like watching an accident in slow motion. Quick as the wink of an eye Mr. Ugly Lizard scooped Mr. Beetle into his mouth. The last thing we saw was Mr. Beetle inside the lizards mouth he was upside down and his legs were thrashing wildly into the air.
     I tried to grab the lizard ( did I think that he would let go of his spoils?) off ran the lizard with the beetle under the fence to the land of no return. I felt so awful and I was stunned to think that my actions led to the beetles demise. I had to bottle up my feelings and deal with the children's emotions. Hey kids! Wasn't that great how Mr. Lizard came to give Mr. Beetle a ride home? That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Later on I shared my story with my fellow teachers, at first they laughed then one teacher asked me "Were any children traumatized?" I said  "No , the only one traumatized was me and I think that I shall have to take the rest of the day off to recover."

Are You Attending the Rapture?

Thursday, May 19, 2011

One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest

     I have been dealing with my elderly mother's health issues and my brothers and my sister's views on what should be done. My mother is eighty-five years old and lives alone in her own home. She lives half a block away from my sister. My three brothers live in the next town over. I live twelve hundred miles away. My mother was diagnosed with cancer last year. My brothers declared themselves too busy with their own lives to be available to help take her to doctor's appointments and chemo. My sister and her husband took on the responsibility and were glad to be able to do so. Two of my three brothers visit mom on rare occasions. Between my siblings they set up meals on wheels, a paid housekeeper and recently hired a nurses aid. The nurse aid is paid through a health insurance policy that my mother had taken out many years ago.
     Two months ago my sister and her husband decided to come to Florida where they have a second home. They very much needed a vacation and our mother's doctor reassured them that it would be the best time to do so. So  my sister delegated the care of our mother to my oldest brother. 
    Upon my sister's return home all hell broke loose. My two brothers are trying to declare that my mother has dementia and are pushing for her to enter a nursing home. My mother has always told me for as long as I can remember to promise to never put her in a nursing/assisted living home.
    Yes mom forgets things, heck she eighty-five. I forget why I walk in a room sometimes, doesn't everyone? Mom is dealing with a lot of stress, being old, having cancer/chemo, her own sister's recent death and she was missing her daughter, my sister. My brother sent me a email telling me that he was handling my mom as if she was a business and he was the CEO. Excuse my french here but What The Fuck!?!
     My brother sent in a psychologist to administer some cognitive tests on mom. The doctor asked my mom many questions and then she asked my mom to take a piece of paper and a pencil and pointed at my mother's wall clock. She asked mom to draw a clock and  to represent the time.
   Mom began drawing as the doctor waited and waited with a smug look of I gotcha on her face. Several minutes passed and then mom handed over the paper. The look on the doctor's face was priceless for on that paper my mother had drawn a true replica of her clock. Her drawing had both dimension and intricate detail. She even drew the cuckoo bird and added the details of the wood craving and painted flowers onto her rendition. What the doctor did not know was that my mother is sly as a fox and she is an artist. My Mom continues through her actions to teach me more than words could ever say. Escape is still possible even from the most oppressive situation.
Thank you Mom!

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Some of Life's Little Instructions

      I did not reach this age without learning a few truths about life. There are many things that I wished I had known a whole lot sooner. There are secrets about life and being a women that my mother never told. I try to share these observations and thoughts with the women in my life.

     Do not expect a man to take care of you. Be independent. Learn how to drive a car. I have a friend who is forty years old and does not drive. She tried to learn how but was put down by her husband's lack of confidence in her. This same woman is not allowed to have a check book because one time she bounced a check. Her husband drives her to the store to grocery shop and he waits in the car. She is given a cash allowance for food shopping. I often wonder what will she do if he dies? I am slowly working on trying to build up her self esteem and empowering her to learn how to drive and how to handle money.

     Education. Be a life learner. I went back to college at the age of 42. It can be done. I graduated with two degrees and with highest honors. I did this while being a widow with two young daughters and an adult son. I also worked a full time job while attending college full time. There is no excuse not to proceed with education. There are many online classes being offered. Some of my college classes were taken with me sitting in my pajamas in front of a computer in the comfort of my own home. There are several young ladies in my life that I have driven up to the local college and held their hands and walked them through the enrollment process. As a matter of fact today is the day that one of them graduates with a degree in Education. I have never been so proud as to hear her thank me for giving her the kick in the butt that she needed to go forward with her education. Not only is she benefiting by her degree but so are the many children who will enter her classroom in the years that come and go. I like to think of it as the  ripple effect like throwing a stone into water and watching how it affects others.
 

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

In honor of Mothers Day! Thank's mom for raisin' me in the Muthahood!

New Disney Movie? Conspiracy Theory ?

     World events this past weekend have got me to thinking. First there were tornadoes ( Wizard of Oz)  Next we had a royal wedding complete with two wicked step sisters ( Eugenie and Beatrice) who wore the world's most ugliest hats. ( see post below titled My Hat It Has Three Corners). Then Cinderella married her Prince. As if that wasn't enough of a plot line, the bad guy met his demise. His body was buried at sea.

Burial at sea? Very Disneylike and reminds me of The Pirates of the Caribbean/Capt. Jack Sparrow walk the plank drama. Now there are questions: Is the bad guy really dead? Where's Waldo? Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?    All I can think is what next?

Bin Laden's Orlando, Florida Connection:House For Sale

http://www.insideedition.com/news/6223/exclusive-tour-inside-bin-laden-family-mansion-in-florida.aspx


Click to read about the Bin Laden connection to Florida.
The most infamous mansion in America and it is literally in my back yard.

Bin Laden

Who done it? My moneys on Colonel Mustard, in the library with a candlestick.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

My Hat It Has Three Corners..




When I saw these pictures all I could think was: There are the two wicked step sisters in this fairy tale of a wedding.
What were  they thinking being seen in public wearing their Vaginas and Fallopian Tubes on their heads?

I think I just spotted a uterus..


Maybe she is wearing the family crest on her head?




She needs to get that abnormal growth checked by a doctor!