Sunday, July 29, 2012

You Sunk My Battleship

A husband and wife who are friends of my sister and her husband came over to visit them. My sister sat in the house with the wife as the husband joined my sisters husband out on the back deck. The deck area faces the pond and boat dock in the backyard. As the men folk were sitting and what we like to refer to as joe jocking..  they kept hearing pings. At first sisters hubby thought the sound was acorns falling on the roof.  He then noticed ripples in the pond near his boat. As he watched he heard and saw that the pings were the sound of something hitting his boat. He walked down the dock and looked in the direction of his neighbor three doors down. The guy had a BB gun and was shooting it at hubby's boat.

"Hey Doug what the hell are you doing?" hollered Hubby. " my grandchild was just here swimming."

 "Hey Ron is that your boat?" screamed Doug.

"You sure as hell know it is Doug"

Ron saw red. If you know anything about my brother in law it is this when he sees red you are dead.

Ron went into the house and climbed the stairs to the bedroom. As he descended the stairs my sister noticed out of the corner of her eye that he was carrying his 22 gage shotgun. She did not think anything of it because he is a retired police officer, retired military and avid hunter. She just thought he was going to show off his gun to his friend because he was leaving in a few days to go hunting. She quickly got a clue when next she heard the boom of his gun and the 22 short round going off.

Ron had stepped onto the dock and aimed a round right at Doug's engine of his boat.

"Hey Doug is that your boat?" "
 "..keep it up and I'm gonna sink your boat"

Doug's wife then pipped in "Hey Ron you think you can hit those beer cans on the floating dock?" On the floating dock Ron noticed that there was a stack of six cans made into a pyramid."

Quickly Ron answered "Only if Doug balances them on his head."


  1. Water is so relaxing... unless there are guns involved! "Is that your boat?" Seriously??? What kind of neighbor does that??? Do they also injure small animals? I think I would be very concerned about that lunatic. That's not funny. Good thing it didn't ricochet and hurt someone, I don't care if it was a BB gun, anything can be dangerous when there's an idiot behind it.

    1. I totally agree with you about the guns. I met Doug when I was there last month,he is a strange person and likes to drink too. One night while there I was sitting on the deck and out of the water popped Doug with a face mask on. I asked what he was doing and he replied..I'm going frogging. ( catching frogs? )
      I swear the people who live on the pond need to stop drinking the water. I keep telling my sister that there is something in that water.

  2. hey carrie lynne! the only guns we have are water guns, and I was reluctant to buy those..........

    hey, thanks for your funny comments on my blog. :) I had actually written a piece a while back about using fake names at starbucks, and then when you said you did that too, I knew you must be my Cyber Twin. Ha! here is the link, hope it makes you laugh:


    ps-- and thank you SO MUCH for having my blog on your sidebar!! wow!!!